We Suck at Running Contests Finalists

We’ve decided on the list of finalists for the We Suck at Running Contests, Contest. There were quite a few good entries and we’d like to thank Arienne for stirring the pot and poaching writers helping us to prod things along.

We will now be handing this list of finalists to our anonymous panel of celebrity judges. Their names are being witheld to avoid bribery, blackmail, and other funny business that Mike Halvorsen the finalists may attempt. So, without further ado, here are the finalists (in no particular order), their entries, and a quick explanation of why we picked them:

Sanjay Sabnani – Every conference needs a funny Indian guy

I believe I deserve this ticket because I am Indian and unlike the activist, Anna Hazare, who is willing to fast until death for his cause, I believe that I can cause real change by networking within arms length of an open bar. I also write really long and dense sentences so Tweeting is not an option. Also, if you have Indians at your event it will automatically make it seem like the conference is GLOBAL in nature. I am also able to handle extreme levels of UV radiation without using sunscreen.

On a more serious note, I am launching a new attraction/aphrodisiac fragrance called http://www.erox.com and I need help marketing. I will also bring samples so that the throngs of women surrounding me and LaFrance will be generously shared with all those who support my bid for this ticket.

If I don’t go who will speak for the people of the forums? My company, http://www.CrowdGather.com is helping preserve forums so that you guys can keep spamming them with low-weighting, do-follow links. What will the future look like if I cannot win this ticket? Pretty darn bleak I say.

Dixon Jones – The token international entry

Here are 10 reasons why I should win.
1: I did not get invited to speak by Loren and the crew.
2: One of my hats is Markering Director of MajesticSEO
3: Anyone truly serious about SEO frankly needs our data in some form unless they want the cheap stuff.
4: Another hat I wear is as a director of Receptional.com
5: Receptional.com tracks thousands of phrases usin AuthorityLabs making us a serious customer
6: I know most of the speakers
7: I know most of AuthorityLabs
8: I have no other good reason to fly over the Atlantic in September except…
9: I need the Airmiles and
10: I’ll probably blog about winning and link to AuthorityLabs.

– gotta be in with a chance!


Michael Halvorsen – The token creepy mustache guy

I would love to attend another conference before the year is up. I had plans to attend PubCon, but we can’t have the entire SEO team (2) out of the office at the same time. BlueGlass TPA would be the perfect opportunity for me to get out of the office for another conference.

While I will not be able to grow a mustache in time for BlueGlass TPA, I would grow a mustache during the month of November in honor of AuthorityLabs. Afterall, I am the #1 mustache consultant – http://www.google.com/search?pws=0&q=mustache+consultant (no Photoshop necessary)

As you can see, I can grow a serious ‘stache and I would most definitely say the ‘stache was sponsored by you guys for the month of Movember I will do a better job at having more pictures taken on a regular basis ( http://michaelhalvorsen.com/2010/11/mustache-brings-girls-yard/ ) and I will feature you guys in my wrap-up post.

So if you like mustaches, I am your guy. Otherwise go ahead and pick someone else who is not as talented as I am.

Justin Freid – Throwing patio chairs at least 25 feet? Score.

I’d love the ticket to attend for a couple of reasons. And here they are:

1. I’d love the opportunity to learn from the team at Blueglass and the kick ass line up of speakers. While I am good at my job, there is always room to learn.
2. I’m about 5 years in to my career in SEM/SEO and am getting to the point where I would like to start speaking at events. I feel networking through this event could help me meet some great people in the industry.
3. I am not your average internet marketer. I am 6’5, 250LBs and an ex football player. So while out at a bar if anyone referred to one of us as a geek etc.. I could beat them up for you.
4. I can throw a patio chair at least 25 feet. Don’t believe me? Let me win and I will show you.
5. I am extremely talented at open bars. Yup.
6. I used to work at a company called LaFrance that sold the little logos on your favorite home appliances.
7. My career hs been mostly in lead generation for the finance, auto insurance and education markets. So I have some great experience in very competitive markets. I think my experience could be valuable to others at the conference.

In summation, I would love the opportunity to attend. I think it could be a valuable learning experience and from the sound of it, a pretty damn good time.

Andrew Norcross – He needs to learn a little about SEO so he stops hating on us

1. I live around the corner, so I’m guaranteed to attend
2. I don’t have the scratch to get a ticket due to recent “events”
3. As a WP developer, I need to learn about SEO to enhance my skillset
4. I’ve worked with many of these people before, so putting a face to the names would be awesome

Congrats to the finalists and thank you to all entrants. Voting for the winner will be completed over the next couple days. All of the judges are on twitter and may be watching the finalists to see who they will cast their vote for (*hint, hint*).

What do you guys think? Who should the judges vote for?

About Brian LaFrance

Brian LaFrance has been involved in various aspects of internet marketing since 1999 and enjoys helping people solve problems. He's currently Lead SEO Analyst for CBS Interactive, runs his own SEO consulting & web development company, and speaks at various industry conferences.

Filed under: Conferences


john andrews

I submit write-in candidate Steve McArthur of Jonesboro, Arkansas. Steve’s the man, quietly working SEO to move his small vacuum cleaner parts store chain online, ever since he saw a vision of the future back in 1998.

I highlighted Steve back in 2006 (http://www.johnon.com/7/seo-the-new-door-to-door-job.html) and it seems he’s still going strong. I can only assume he’d be a great guest at Blue Glass. Plus, Arkansas is not that far from Tampa.

Mike Ramsey

I think it needs to be Michael. Why? His picture says it all. If you dont choose him you will have done the conference a major injustice and I will be force to create
labsauthority.com and authoritylabs competitor with a surprisingly similar name and slightly less better charts.

Brian LaFrance

Good thing we’re not the ones making the final decision on it 🙂

There are currently 10 people (none from AuthorityLabs) who will be submitting votes and we’re waiting to hear back from a few more on whether or not they want to vote on this 🙂

Aaron Bradley

While many of the contestants’ credentials are impressive, no-one stands a chance if they attempt to go head-to-head with Michael Halvorsen’s mustache. That he’s an actual living, breathing SEO expert with mounds of good information to share doesn’t hurt either.

Ben Cook

I’m from IL where we vote early and often so I think I can throw votes to Sanjay (dude loaned me money I’ve gotta give him props), Norcross (dude is my WordPress savior) and Halvorsen (I want to see the ‘stache in person).

Dan Patterson

Go for the mustache guy – Halvorsen. The mustache isn’t creepy, it’s awesome!

Annie Cushing

@Dan, Halvorsen’s stache tips the scales of creepy, but it’s (errrm) memorable. I want to see before and after pics after it’s shaved. Posted on Twitter, of course.

Dr. Pete

I have to add a vote for Mike for his refreshing humility in a sea of egos – “Otherwise go ahead and pick someone else who is not as talented as I am.” 😉

Michael Dorausch

This is a tough vote, I’m gonna go with Halvorsen simply cause I haven’t met him yet in person, but I’ve already seen his x-rays.

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